Become a Digital Minimalist

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Recently I watched a family in a restaurant as they ate their entire meal looking at their phones. None of them actually interacted with each other the whole time.

Tech companies design devices and apps to be addictive. It’s how they make their money. In my Authentic Leadership Academies, I ask participants is to leave their phones outside. It’s not an easy ask, especially the first day. But by the end of the week participants leave freer, more at peace, and more connected to themselves and others than they have felt in a long time.

Until about ten years ago, it was unavoidable to have times in your day when it was just you alone with your thoughts…while in line at a store, waiting for an elevator, walking the dog, commuting to work, at the gym. Now we’ve banished that time.

I love Cal Newport’s approach to technology. He calls it becoming a “digital minimalist.” Turn off your phone periodically and take your freedom back. Stop relying on digital media to meet our emotional needs or distract us from the discomfort of reality, and use for the function for which it was developed: information sharing and communication.

Let’s reconnect to ourselves and to the world around us. Let’s become digital minimalists.

Psychological Safety: It’s About Good Leadership

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Psychological safety, no matter how you spin it, boils down to basic good leadership. And good leadership is best measured by one question: Do people feel safe to bring you the bad news?

There’s always bad news. People make mistakes. Expectations aren’t met. Frustrations arise.

Don’t gauge the health of your leadership by the amount of bad news, but by how people deal with it. If you aren’t hearing bad news maybe people don’t feel safe to tell you the truth. You can’t simply have an “open door policy” and expect that people will bound through that door. You have to get out of your office, engage, be intentional about listening to concerns, genuinely care about your people, value their input, and, above all, be honest about mistakes you make. You have to model bringing bad news responsibly – without blaming or criticizing.

Good leaders who make it safe to bring the bad news unlock potential, foster trust, drive innovation, and improve team performance.

What are you doing to make it safe for people to bring you the bad news?

Unveiling Beauty Through The Lens of Clarity

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I woke up last week after cataract surgery to a renewed appreciation of the beauty in the world. With the haze of clouded vision gone, the sky is brilliant blue. The trees have a hue of green I have not known for years. The snow on the mountains looks pristine white. With renewed visual clarity and color perception, I’m truly seeing the world through a new set of lenses. It feels as though I have been transported into a new earth.

I’ve been reflecting about the gift and the curse of adaptation, as in when the cataracts, over time, cloud our eyes to the point of not knowing what we don’t know. The curse comes when we adapt so well to our circumstances, we can become blind to the toxicity of relationships. It isn’t until we step away with a new set of lenses that we realize how we’ve been adapting to something that’s limiting and even harming us.

It’s important to pay attention, to stay present, and to step away periodically to renew our perspective.

RISE ABOVE – Unleashing Potential Through the Power of Accountability

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From the ages of fourteen to eighteen I worked part-time alongside Bob Dye, a carpenter that my parents hired for renovation projects. I remember the care that Bob put into his work. He was a true craftsman. He left nothing to chance. He took pride in his work. He taught me how to hold a hammer and how to sink a nail. He taught me how to use a power saw safely and how to square a floor in a crooked house. He showed up every day on time with a smile on his face and a positive attitude. Whether he was framing or finishing, craftsmanship showed through in everything he did.

He was patient with me when I made mistakes. I think he liked working with me because I showed up on time and worked hard. In hindsight, I’m sure I slowed him down, but he never mentioned it. I remember cutting a dozen two-by-fours three inches too short. He smiled and responded, “I also had to learn the hard way that it’s always good to measure twice and cut once.” I imagine my dad talked with him about having him apprentice me, both in carpentry and in life. My attitude was certainly bigger than my skill level, and he respected me for that. He was shy and gentle and had a big heart and was always kind and generous to me. I looked forward to working alongside him on Saturdays, after school, holidays, and summers. Dad would work with us whenever he could. I’m grateful that I had older men in my life that loved me, took time for me, and were good role models.

My parents paid Bob by the project, and when the project was done, he would give them an invoice and say, “Take your time and inspect our work. If it meets your standards, pay me. If not, there’s no charge and we’ll re-do it.” Bob was serious, even though not getting paid would have put a severe financial hit on his family. He also had a respectful way of making me feel part of his team, that we had achieved this together, even though he did the real work and there was just the two of us.

That pay-me-when-you-know-it’s-done-right approach was not a show. It was a demonstration of integrity. It was an expression of his character. And not once, in all those years, did we have to re-do a job or not get paid. As it turned out, Bob inspired me with a blueprint for how to run my business for the past forty years.

It’s inspiring to be around an accountable person, a person that can be counted on, a person that takes pride in their work, who demonstrates care and civility, who shows up, is committed to creating value before they get paid, and who makes you a better person for being in their presence. I’ll always cherish Bob for being my mentor.

Accountability is not a hammer to punish people. Accountability was never meant to be used as a disciplinary measure. Even though we need to face the consequences of our choices, accountability is not an HR performance management process or appraisal program. Accountability – the ability to be counted on – is a philosophy of life that inspires and empowers us to rise above mediocrity, renews our workplaces, restores our mojo, and gives us our freedom.

From Struggle To Emergence: Adversity as a Call To Creation

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When I launched my speaking profession, I partnered exclusively with a speakers’ bureau. Speakers’ bureaus serve a great purpose as intermediaries between professional speakers and clients. They represented me, did all the negotiations, booking, marketing, and event coordination.

After three years of working with them, they went bankrupt. It was devastating. I was shocked, angry, and dismayed that a company I trusted could leave me with several thousands of dollars in unpaid invoices. There was security in that relationship. I could count on the work, clients were cared for, and the money was there, just like a “secure” corporate job.

Through the light of times perspective, I now see that the loss of the money and relationship turned out to be a good thing. Adversity can be something wanting to be born. Ending that relationship allowed me to take flight, spread my wings, and find my own way in the marketplace. I would not have found my voice and built my business to what it is today had I stayed in that comfortable, “secure” relationship.

Adversity truly is an opportunity to call forth our potential, summon our hidden strengths, and birth new possibilities – even if the labour of that birth can be painful and arduous.

Territory vs. Hierarchy

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In Steven Pressfield’s book, The War Of Art, he describes how, in the animal kingdom, individuals define themselves either by their rank within a hierarchy (a hen in a pecking order, a wolf in a pack) or by their connection to a territory (a home base, a hunting ground, a turf).

It’s also how humans define their place in the world and find security.

Of the two orientations, hierarchical is the default setting. We naturally run in packs and cliques, we know who the top dog and underdog are. We define ourselves by the position within the schoolyard, the gang, the club. An individual who defines themselves by their place in the pecking order will compete and compare themselves to others based on popularity and rankings. School, advertising, the entire materialist culture hammers home to us from birth to define ourselves by others’ opinions. Drink this beer. Buy these clothes. Get this job. Live in this house, and everyone will love you.

In the animal world there is also a territorial orientation. Every fall, a bear would pass through our former neighborhood on his way to find a place to hibernate. All the bird feeders and berry branches and garbage cans in the area were his. While he was around, no animal dared try to intrude on his territory.
Humans have territories, too. Taylor Swift’s territory is the stage. Connor McDavid’s territory is the rink. When Bill Gates pulls into the parking lot at Microsoft, he’s in his territory. When I’m in front of an audience of difference makers I’m in mine.

According to Pressfield, a territory provides sustenance. Runners and rock climbers and kayakers and yogis and painters and ranchers and entrepreneurs feel a helluva lot better after they’ve spent time in their territory. A territory sustains us without external input. A territory can only be claimed alone. A territory can only be claimed by work. And a territory returns exactly what you put in.

What’s your territory?