Tag Archive for: leadership development

The Truth About Good Leadership: Start By Being A Good Person

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In Jim Collin’s classic book, “Good to Great,” he showed how great companies triumph over time and how long-term sustained performance can be engineered into the DNA of an enterprise from the very beginning. It’s not only a good book. It’s a great book.

In the pursuit of greatness, which Collin’s book undoubtedly will inspire, don’t forget the foundation: goodness. In a world that reveres the pursuit of greatness, basic values such as kindness, consideration, honesty, compassion, dependability, respect for others, and hard work, are undervalued. How often do we see the winners of gold medals, leaders of successful companies, and the Stanley Cup champions venerated in the headlines of our national newspapers? Compare these kinds of recognized accomplishments with people revered for being a good person, for simply exhibiting qualities of strong character.

In my workshops I use an exercise: Think of three people you admire. They could be real people, such as Abraham Lincoln or your grandmother, or mythical characters such as Hercules or Santa Claus. For me, they would be my mother, my father, and Viktor Frankl.

Now think of the character traits that make each of your chosen characters admirable to you. For example, I admire my mother for her wisdom; my father for his compassion, and Viktor Frankl for his resiliency and dignity.

I then have my workshop participants compare these admirable traits with the typical success markers of our culture, the kind of traits featured in Fortune magazine. After doing this exercise with thousands of people, I have yet to have any choose characters they admire with qualities such as fame, beauty, power, youth, or wealth. It is fascinating that culturally we gravitate unconsciously to things that ultimately mean so little to us.

What I’m saying is that the roots of great, authentic leadership are being a good person. Don’t go for greatness until others view you as exhibiting the qualities of “goodness.” There’s nothing wrong with the inspiring path of “greatness,” if that is what is important to you. But if, on the journey to success by the world’s standards (what I call outer success), you lose contact with inner success, (the realization of goodness in your life), what will you be left with?

You want to be a good leader? Start with being a good person. Then you’ll have something to stand on in the pursuit of greatness.

The New Workplace: Some Reflections on Hierarchy

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We are witnessing the birth of an entire new way of living and working together in organizations. Since the Second World War, through the tumultuous 60’s and into the age of enlightenment, we have seen an unprecedented evolution of human consciousness. We have experienced profound changes in almost every aspect of our lives. While technology and the emergence of the internet have obviously changed our lives, there has also been a more subtle, more pervasive, and even more powerful change: our independence from hierarchy.

The following is an abbreviated and rather oversimplified list of how the modern world has changed in its perception of hierarchy.

Under The Old Hierarchical Model:

  1. The hierarchy – whether in church, families, educational systems, or the workplace – has the authority.
  2. People are of unequal value, and they dominate or submit to one another.
  3. Roles are what give people power and status.
  4. People have power over each other, and their feelings of isolation, fear, anger, and distrust are denied and suppressed in the name of order.
  5. People are expected to conform, to live up to external norms.
  6. One right way exists, and the dominant person knows what it is.
  7. People deny their own experiences so as to accept the voice of authority.
  8. Security requires maintaining the status quo, as change is seen as undesirable and abnormal.
  9. Creativity, dissention, and individuality are suppressed because there is only “one right way”: the voice of authority.
  10. Loyalty is defined as devotion to authority.

Under The New Growth Model:

  1. People are their own authority, where we learn to listen and trust our own inner voice and conscience.
  2. People are of equal value, and relationships are between equals in value.
  3. Roles are distinct from power and status; leadership is about presence, not position.
  4. People feel connected to each other with an ownership of self, respect for others, and freedom of expression; the darker side of our nature is brought into the light.
  5. Each person is unique and can define him or herself from an inner source of strength and validation.
  6. Many ways usually exist, and we can use our own criteria to choose an approach.
  7. People acknowledge their own experiences to validate their own authority.
  8. Security comes from personal development and self-confidence.
  9. Circular thinking and a systems approach replaces linear thinking; new discovery, creativity, and connections are encouraged.
  10. Loyalty is defined as devotion to self in the service of others.

I was first introduced to the Growth Model over thirty years ago by one of my early mentors, Virginia Satir. As a society, we have been slowly emerging into this model over the past few decades but with a history of centuries of living in the old model, we are all relatively very new at this way of thinking.

The Growth Model, especially while we are learning to embrace it, can be difficult to accept. Teachers in our school system today ask, “Where is the respect for authority?” I suspect it is much more difficult to be a parent today than in my grandparent’s day. And it is much more difficult to create workplaces during the transition to the new model, where there is far less respect for positional power and a new loyalty is yet to fully be understood and embraced. Many are lamenting how the world is now “falling apart” in an age of self-serving, narcissistic individualism. Many are yearning to return to the “good old days,” where managing people through positional power was undoubtedly more simple and straight-forward.

I believe there is a deep, inner yearning to embrace the growth model, just as a plant yearns for the light, or a child yearns to ride a bike. But the awkwardness, the scrapes, and bruises in the early stages of bike riding invite a protective parent to return their child to familiar, safer territory. Yet, even in the chaos of the transition, we are long past the point of no return. In the spirit of transcendence and inclusion, the “old” list notes those aspects that have been outgrown. The “new” list leans in the direction of the most positive aspects of the emerging consciousness. What is the good side of the old hierarchal approach that we must safeguard? What is the darker side of the growth model that we must be aware of and work to overcome? Three challenges lie ahead as we continue to emerge into this new consciousness:

Patience with ourselves and with others is required in the transition. Living and working together without the security of a hierarchy is both daunting and awkward. To forge our way through life’s deeper terrain requires different perceptions and skills than what it took to follow someone else’s dictates. Understanding and healing the troublesome parts of ourselves and the world, as opposed to repressing and punishing the darker parts of the human experience, requires skills that few of us have been taught. A beginners mind is required as we step into this new world with openness and curiosity. Like embracing any needed change, we must be willing to let go of our need for certainty.

Embrace the paradoxes. In an effort to find freedom, the pendulum of independence has swung toward self-importance. The growth model is not about narcissism. It’s about self-expression in service. Sounds simple, but find ourself asking, “If I declare independence from the tyranny of hierarchy, will I not end up drowning in the pool of self-centeredness?” Yet if I neglect myself and serve only the greater good, what will happen to my soul? An authentic response to this paradox is to stay with the struggle by embracing the value of both. Maturity – and subsequent consciousness – asks us to live in the paradox without expecting a heavy-handed, overly simplistic solution. It seems inevitable to swing back and forth between the questions in order to continue to grow.

Trust the process. While pain and discomfort are a part of life, we must embrace our destiny – the call to evolve and emerge with a new consciousness. Just as we must embrace the paradox, we must remember that the goal is to be more authentic, fearless, and free. As we stay conscious: of our perceptions, of our biases, of our limited beliefs, of our present experience, and of our vision of a new world, growth, and a new world, is inevitable.

Self Leadership – Leading As A Work Of Art

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“One’s self is at the base of everything. Every action is a manifestation of the self. A person who doesn’t know himself can do nothing for others.” ~ Eiji Yoshikawa

Understanding leadership from the perspective of techniques and tools is like trying to appreciate a painting by analyzing the strokes or the brush of the painter. It might be interesting, but it doesn’t get to the essence of the painting or the substance of the painter.

You don’t become a painter by putting on a painter’s beret and sitting at behind an easel. You become a painter through years of disciplined action, attentive observation, thorough study, and, above all, rigorous practice.

The life of a leader is akin to the life of an artist. It’s not a destination to be achieved; it’s a journey, a continual work in progress, a life to be embraced. Of course there are techniques to be learned and tools to be developed along the way, but it ultimately comes down to one’s self, the essence of who you bring to the work.

To transform others and the world around you involves staying engaged in your own transformational work. You cannot guide others where you have not been. You earn credibility as a transformational leader by investing and engaging in your own transformational journey. Following are some disciplines for strengthening your leadership presence, your capacity to inspire and influence others through your presence:

  1. Set out on adventures.
    These could be external adventures, like taking up a new sport or instrument, climbing a mountain or starting a new career. They could also be more of an internal nature like getting through a divorce, facing an addiction, or becoming a new parent. What have you done recently where you are a “novice?” Where have you traveled to unfamiliar territory? Adventures build internal resources, compassion for others, and confidence.
  2. Embrace challenges.
    People of strong leadership presence, what some refer to as character, find a special attractiveness in difficulty, since it is only by coming to terms with difficulty that they can realize their potential. Victims and those with entitlement mind-sets never inspire anyone. Welcoming challenges as opportunities to grow give you the self-leadership courage and clarity needed to lead others.
  3. Embrace the darker side(s) of your nature.
    We all have a darker side living below what we show to the world. If we do not bring to the surface and face the this part of us that we may be unaware of, or blind to, it will bring pain to ourselves and/or others. Within this shadow side of our nature lies immense creativity, wisdom, and interconnection. Transformational leaders make room for this dark side of themselves and of the systems they lead, recognizing it for what it is: a natural part of the larger system. What worries you? What makes you anxious? What upsets you? What gives you a strong negative emotional reaction? Name it. Claim it. Learn from it. Experience what you are avoiding.
  4. Make room for reflection and stillness.
    Self-leadership, developing a stronger, more influential presence, means making time for daily solitude, silence, and the space to attend to the voice within. Spend time in nature. Create a sanctuary in your life, a place where you can get away from life’s demands and listen to the wisdom of stillness. Take time for rest, renewal, and refection in periods of months, weeks, days, or even five minutes at the beginning of a day. If you are only following the voices of the crowd around you, you aren’t leading; you are merely managing.
  5. Build a community around you.
    Who are your friends, people in your life you can be wholly yourself with, who will support you to be true to your inner voice, help you foster and express your gifts, your unique talents; people who will not be afraid to tell you the truth? Who leads you to your authentic voice? Who supports you? Who holds you accountable? How would you describe your community?
  6. Be willing to stand alone.
    Leadership means being willing to stand apart in order to impart. You can’t lead by being part of the crowd. Leadership is, at times, lonely. If you haven’t felt lonely as a leader, you haven’t gone far enough in your development.

How would you describe a “personal transformation” you have experienced in the past 1-2 years? How has your own transformational journey made you a more credible leader?  I’d love to hear from you.

Women In Leadership: It’s About PRESENCE, Not Position

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We need more women in leadership positions. Women have the experience and understanding that it takes to meet the changing landscape of today’s workplace reality. They connect. They are intuitive. They know how to collaborate, how to build consensus, and what real networks are about. They think holistically. And they care.

I realize these are wholesale generalizations. Not all women have the all these skills and traits, and not all men are void of these. To understand women in leadership (as well as men), it is important to understand the two energies at play when people interact. In Chinese philosophy, the concept of “yin” and “yang” is used to describe how seemingly opposite or contrary forces are interconnected and interdependent in the natural world, and how they give rise to each other as people interrelate to one another. It is important to note that this is not a male/female dichotomy, as both men and women carry both these forces. However, women generally are the primary carriers of “yin” energy, while men are generally the primary carriers of “yang.”

“Yang” is about:

  • Moving Outward
  • Achievement
  • Separating
  • Segregation
  • Silos
  • “Fixing,” “Resolving” “Doing”
  • Strategy
  • Courage
  • Exploration
  • Linear
  • Functional
  • Masculine
  • “The Destination”

“Yin” is about:

  • Moving Inward
  • Engagement
  • Connecting
  • Relationship
  • Collaboration
  • “Being”
  • Intuition
  • Compassion
  • Attraction
  • Holistic
  • Integrated
  • Feminine
  • “The Journey”

Consider which list you identify with most strongly. You may find personal balance within you as you see different sides of yourself coming forward in different roles. If you don’t identify more strongly with one list over the other, it may indicate an already integrated person, evolving toward a balance between “yin” and “yang.”

The purpose of all relationships is to move us toward integration, wholeness.

Hence, if you are strongly aligned with one side of the spectrum, you are likely to get into a relationship (with a person or an organization) who is on the other end. Of course, the reason that drew you together is to help you develop the undeveloped side of yourself. Yet, before you know it, the reason that brought you together soon becomes your battle ground!

So… what does all this have to do with women in leadership? The Western world, and the organizations within these societies, for centuries have been predominantly run on “yang,” masculine energy. The evolution of human consciousness is awakening the “yin,” feminine energy with us. Employees today are insisting on engagement, collaboration, and creativity in their work. Customers are expecting more than a good product. They want good service. Creating a great experience for both employees and customers, requires a new kind of awareness, an awakening of the “yin” side of the cultures that serve us.

In order to create a workplace culture worth coming to and a workplace that best serves this new world, masculine energy alone will be insufficient. What we need are men and women in leadership at every level in organizations who are aware and courageous enough to bring their feminine side to their work.

What we don’t need are women in leadership roles suppressing their feminine nature in order to fit into the outdated, masculine world in order to “get ahead” in the organization. It’s about presence, not position.

Laissez faire Leadership or Lazy Fare Abdication: It Takes Courage To Let Go

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Not long ago I was hired by a CEO to help assess and develop the leadership capacity of one of his managers. I started by interviewing the manager and each member of his leadership team. There was a consistent theme in the interviews. “He’s practicing laissez faire leadership,” I was told, with frustration, by his team. In actuality, it wasn’t “laissez faire” leadership at all. It was “lazy fare abdication.” Rather than leading at all, he was abandoning his leadership responsibilities. Ignoring people and leaving them without direction, clarity, or accountability left him with a team of frustrated, disgruntled subordinates.

When I asked this manager about his approach, he explained that he was a laissez faire leader, that he believed that people work much better when they are “left alone,” and that he was developing a “self-directed,” leaderless team.

This manager had the wrong understanding of what it means to a laissez faire leader. Laissez faire doesn’t mean “lazy fare.” It’s not about passive abandonment of your responsibilities, which is what his approach ended up being. It’s not about abdication. Laissez faire leadership is actually very strategic, focused, and deliberate. It takes maturity, clarity, and precision to lead with a laissez faire approach.

Laissez faire comes from the French, “leave it be”, or “let go.” Laissez faire from a leader’s perspective is a non-authoritarian style of leadership that achieves control through more subtle means. It is an approach to leadership that assumes that people excel when they are left alone to respond to their responsibilities and obligations in their own ways.

Below are three essential qualities needed to be an effective laissez faire leader:

  1. Connection
    You have to be connected to your team and your employees so you know how much they need the presence and availability of their leader. You have to know if a group is mature enough to function without the boss being around. If you back off too soon, as this manager did, you will breed resentment and frustration on your team. If you try to make a team “self-directed” when they don’t have the maturity and good will required, you end up with an assassinated leader who attempts to step into the role without the organizational support.
  2. Maturity
    Related to strategy #1, you can’t operate with a laissez faire leadership approach when you are parenting two-year olds. While extending trust to others by backing away and letting go can be an important tool for developing the maturity to function more independently, you have to know your staff enough to know when to back off and when to be more directive.
  3. Courage and Clarity
    “Letting go” in not passive. Letting go means being actively engaged with your staff and stepping away intentionally, knowing that backing off and extending trust will help them grow. To have the courage to do this, you need to have a solid accountability process in place, so everyone understands their roles and responsibilities, both from themselves and from every member of the team. You can’t be lazy if you want to be a laissez faire leader. It takes active involvement, awareness, and intentional, clear action.

What is your experience with laissez faire leadership? What works? What doesn’t work? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below.

Is It Time To Change Your Change Management Plan?

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he problem with most change management plans in organizations is that they are doing just that: they are managing the change, not leading people through the change. To illustrate the limitations of most change management plans, think about the last time you relocated with a new job. What was your change management plan? Your plan may have been: 1) Call a realtor, find a new place to live; 2) Sell your house; 3) Purchase a new house or finalize a new rental agreement; 4) Schedule your movers; 5) Schedule cleaners for after the move.

Your unique plan could be quite different, but if your list looks anything like this one, there is one key point missing: leadership. Creating and implementing a plan like this is all about management: Defining, prioritizing, and executing. Leadership, on the other hand, is very different. Authentic leadership is about connecting with people: supporting and guiding them through the change. Change occurs outside of a person and requires management, while transition occurs inside of a person and requires leadership. Transitions are the reorientation that people go through as they come to terms with change. Organizations make a huge error when the two are confused or if they neglect attending to the leadership.

Leading people through the transition gets to the impact of the change on people and relationships. For example, what are you letting go of in the move? What’s going on inside you as you make this transition? How are you handling resistance, which always accompanies change to some degree? How is the change affecting your relationships?

“It’s not so much that we’re afraid of change and uncertainty or so in love with the old ways,” wrote the late Marilyn Ferguson, American author and philosopher, “but it’s that place in between that we fear… It’s like being in between trapezes. It’s Linus when his blanket is in the dryer. There’s nothing to hold on to.”

We’ve all heard that when “one door closes, another one opens.” What they don’t tell you is that it’s hell in the corridor. Here are a few pointers to get you through the corridor. In leading change, you have an accountability as a leader to ensure that every change management plan incorporates the following:

  1. Give people a clear rationale for the change.
    Why are we changing? How will we be better off because of the change?  While change is necessary, not all change is good. If you have no solid reason for changing, you have no business initiating change.
  2. Give people a vision.
    Asking people to step into the corridor of uncertainty is a part of leading people through the transition to a new reality. If you are always certain, you aren’t changing. Uncertainty is an essential ingredient to growth. But in responsible leadership, uncertainty should not be about where you are headed. Change always starts with an inspiring vision of the future.
  3. Give people dignity and respect.
    In order to build a strong and civil high performance culture, every right must be accompanied by a subsequent responsibility. You have a right to make changes, as leaders. You have an accompanying responsibility to inititiate change in a respectful, honest way. For example, if you are going to move, don’t dump the move onto people. Give people the dignity and respect they deserve to understand and come to terms with the change.
  4. Give people compassion.
    It takes time to adjust to change. People usually bitch before they build. Get out of your office. Be connected. Listen to people’s concerns. Allow people to grieve. Give them time to let go. While the corridor of change may not be a time of productivity, it’s a great time to build community. Leadership through transitions is about caring for people, not manipulating them. While you may be able to control things, you can’t control people.
  5. Give people information.
    Tell people what you know. Tell them what you don’t know. Be honest. Be transparent. Be real.
  6. Give people boundaries.
    People need some structure to get through the corridor of change. They need to know that there are both accountable and unaccountable ways to handle emotions. It’s okay to grieve, to vent, to express resistance in constructive, contained places and respectful ways. It’s not okay to complain incessently, tear down others, and undermine the change initiatives. There’s a difference between constructive venting and destructive bitching.
  7. Give people a decision point.
    Similar to boundaries, people need to know when it it’s time to move on. They need to know that while venting, grieving, and expressing concerns are all valid emotional responses to change, eventually you have to build a bridge and get over it. Eventually you have to get through the corridor to the other side. And if you stay in the corridor too long, you’ll start to rot. If you seeing indicators of low morale, resentment, cynicism, resignation, bitterness, or indifference, it means you’ve been in the corridor too long.
  8. Give people a compass.
    If you’ve ever been lost in the wilderness you know that road maps don’t always work. What you need when you are lost is a compass, a set of values and guiding principles that remain constant and reliable during uncertainty and upheaval. A compass with a clear calibration pointing toward your destination will keep you on track in the transition.
  9. Give people your trust.
    Change creates all kinds of opportunities. The most important of these is the opportunity to extend trust: trust that people will come to terms with change in their own way and in their own time. Trust that with a clear vision you will get there together. While you care about people, you don’t have to carry people.
  10. Give people your courage.
    With every change you develop new resources. After all, this is one of the primary the purposes of the human experience: to grow and learn. Courage will naturally emerge when you have the courage to face and come to grips with change in your own life. Change is the courage to step off the cliff and grow wings on the way down.

Are some of these strategies for leadership in transitions missing in your change management plan? What can you do to improve on your current approach to change management? How can you bring a more human quality to your change management approach? Is it time to change your change management plan?