Tag Archive for: leadership

I love Halloween.

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I love going to a party wearing a mask so people don’t know who you are. I would even dress up when I took our daughters trick or treating. It’s a blast being incognito.

However, when we unintentionally wear masks to protect ourselves we present a curated version of ourselves to the world, hiding our true self. We can identify so strongly with the mask – the calm mask, the humor mask, the overachiever mask, the accountable mask, the perfectionistic mask, the people-pleasing mask – that we aren’t even aware we are wearing one or who our real self is any longer.

While they serve important protective functions, prolonged masking can take a toll on our mental health. Suppressing true emotions can lead to anger, rage, depression, and disease in the body. It’s exhausting and isolating.

So have fun wearing masks this Halloween. Just be sure you choose to wear them and know when to take them off and reveal the real you.

What does “good with yourself” look and feel like?

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First, it means having the courage to be open to an awareness of yourself, and how your life impacts those around you. It’s about knowing what drives you and what blocks you while understanding and appreciating your blind spots. It’s about facing the darker sides of your nature, to acknowledge the traumas, inadequacies, self-doubts, insecurities, and fears, and having the willingness to work with and heal these aspects of yourself.

Second, being “good with yourself” means having a degree of self-acceptance. Rather than judging, acceptance means realizing that all behavior stems from positive intent, and healing begins with learning to be friendly with all parts of yourself. It means appreciating that each aspect of yourself can be both a blessing and a potential curse, a strength, and a weakness. Acceptance means finding empathy for others by being gentle with yourself.

Third, being “good with yourself” means taking action, having an orientation toward results. Action means a life-long commitment to continually change, to learn, to grow, to evolve. Growth is a combination of self-awareness and risk-taking. Action means not trying to do everything that everyone expects of you in the way they expect it but to feel comfortable enough with yourself to take the necessary risks that move you out of your comfort zones. You no longer have to create an illusion that you are further along that you are.

Being “good with yourself” means being comfortable enough to be who you are and keep growing. Being “good with yourself” means remembering what enough actually feels like.

 

What’s it like to live authentically?

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What’s it like to live authentically?

When asking people their experience of living authentically and inauthentically, they describe living when not being themselves as “Exhausting,” “Depressing,” “Sad,” “Stressful,” “Lonely,” “Disengaged,” “Empty,” “Lost.”

When asked what it’s like to live accepting of yourself, responses include: “Happy,” “Confident,” “Joyous,” “Free,” “Inspiring,” “Appreciative,” “Alive,” “Fulfilled.”

When we create places that support people to work and live true to themselves, we create work that’s meaningful. They lose all track of time at work and make a massive contribution to the organization.

What are you doing to create authentic workplaces, where people contribute in a way that is aligned with their authentic self – their “sweet spot?”

Attracting and Retaining The Right People

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Attracting and Retaining The Right People

I had an amazing experience during the first of a four-part webinar series on Authentic Leadership with Trucking HR Canada.

The trucking and logistics industry is complex, sophisticated, and built on grass-roots values. Like many industries, leaders are dealing with rising input costs, tight margins, increased pressure on time, and a continual shortage of team members. In the midst of these pressures, one thing leaders have control over is the culture they create.

If you want to attract others, you must be attractive:

1. Commit to leadership. There’s a difference between a boss and a leader. Bosses might get the job done, but leaders create a culture that inspires the right people to sign up and stay.

2. Ensure a healthy Senior Leadership Team. There is a direct relationship between the health of the leadership team and a culture that keeps people.

3. Hire for attitude. You can’t train someone to be nice. Hire good people and train them to execute good processes. In the words of the management guru Peter Drucker, “Hire s-l-o-w-l-y. Fire quickly.”

4. Foster alignment. We have to align people to the organizational values, and even more importantly we need to align the organization to the values of the people who make that organization what it is. Creating a place for people to live their values at work in a way that supports the values of the culture is what builds loyalty, ensures the long-term success of your organization, and creates a place worth working in.

There are people who do not feel safe at work. They don’t feel safe to speak honestly, offer ideas, or be themselves.

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There are people who do not feel safe at work. They don’t feel safe to speak honestly, offer ideas, or be themselves.

They fear that sharing concerns and mistakes will mean embarrassment or retribution; that if they are honest, they will be humiliated, ignored, or blamed. They fear asking questions when they are unsure of something. They sit on their hands, stay within the lines, underperform and become dissatisfied.

When people are afraid, they stay dangerously silent, they disengage, they lie, and they leave if they can. Or worst of all, they quit and stay.

Far too many managers – knowingly and unknowingly – believe that fear motivates. Too many managers are unaware of how unacknowledged stress and anxiety breeds fear. Brain science has demonstrated that fear inhibits learning, productivity, engagement, innovation, and fulfillment.

How can we, as leaders, create safe workplaces?

Why leadership training and development are so critical and why our teams deserve it.

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Three things I’ve learned about personal and leadership development:

  1. The greatest gift you can give someone is your own personal development. And one of the greatest gifts you can give your team is the gift of learning. Becoming a stronger, wiser, kinder person doesn’t just benefit you, it benefits those around you.
  2. Don’t mistake vertical growth for horizontal growth. I know of leaders who go on annual development courses to go deep into what we used to describe as horizontal growth. But now, podcasts, TED talks, Youtube videos and books, though useful, don’t necessarily allow you to go deeper. There’s a difference between learning “about leadership” (horizontal growth) and true leadership development (vertical growth).
  3. Development keeps us fresh, engaged, and relevant. Don’t put off developing yourself or your team. Leadership and personal development gives us perspective and strategies to navigate our world. Jim Rohn emphasized the crucial choice between discipline and regret: “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.”