What portion of your day is spent intentionally connecting with your team?

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Why it matters and how to make it part of your routine in a meaningful way.

I’m usually very reluctant to reach out spontaneously to my teams – my work team and the one I chair in my non-profit world. I score high on the introvert scale, so it isn’t easy to initiate conversations. I also don’t like to interrupt people and intrude on their time.

But when I don’t reach out enough I know it can be interpreted as a lack of caring – which is the furthest thing from the truth.

Both teams under my care are remote teams, so to reach out regularly means phone calls or virtual conversations. What’s important is that I take the time to understand what the expectations are and to sincerely make the effort to reach out more often. My teams need to know I care about their work and more importantly, they need to know that I care about them as people.

How that gets expressed is dependent on individual needs, personalities, and preferred styles of communication.

Good leadership requires good boundaries.

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I used to think that a good leader put everyone and everything else above themself. Now I know that good leadership is about balance between attending to our own needs and those of the people we serve. And to serve well, service must come from overflow, not from emptiness.

Leadership flows from our well-being.

I was inspired this week by the signature on the bottom of a client’s email:
Please allow for 24-48 hours for all email responses
My working hours may not be your working hours. Please do not feel you need to reply outside of your normal work schedule.

I don’t respect myself when I don’t have good boundaries. And I don’t respect others who don’t have good boundaries. I can’t trust your yes if you don’t know how to say no.

As we wrestle with this, consider:

  1. Time boundaries – Clear working hours and protection of personal time
  2. Physical boundaries – Defining personal space in the workplace
  3. Emotional boundaries – Managing emotional involvement with team members
  4. Big Rock boundaries – Defined focused time on tasks that matter most
  5. Technology boundaries – Distinct times where you turn off devices
  6. Personal boundaries – Maintaining healthy self-care practices

The relationship between accountability and grace – when to hold the line and when to let it go

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When our daughter was a teenager she asked to change her curfew for a special event. We wrestled with the decision as she took the time to build her case. We eventually changed the curfew, and to this day I don’t know if it was the right decision. Often there is no “right” decision, but going through the struggle of the decision gave our daughter a clear message -that we care.

If you are blindly pleasing people or thoughtlessly and continuously coming down on people, you likely aren’t building a high trust culture. Sometimes you simply don’t know when to hold the line and when to let it go. But if you are invested in the struggle, people will know you care and will lean into trusting you – and you will ultimately get the desired results from your people.

A Token Of Appreciation

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After my webinar on Psychological Safety this past week, I had a great conversation with Marg, my VP of Client Care. We reminisced about when she was the Senior Manager of Learning and Development at Lilydale and I consulted on some projects there. Lilydale was established over 75 years ago as an Alberta Farmers’ cooperative and today is a proud member of the Sofina Foods family. It always promised to provide Canadians with great tasting and high-quality Canadian poultry products as it built an incredible culture with some incredible leaders.

One of the great tools they used for building and reinforcing their culture was a Token of Appreciation. You were encouraged to give this token to anyone you sincerely appreciated. It was a coin, along with a little poem, to remind them not to take each other for granted and to continue strengthening the muscle of expressing gratitude.

I’ve learned that this kind of tool has to be built on sincere, honest, and caring relationships – which were evident at Lilydale. No tool can compensate for failure to connect.

Teamship – The Undervalued Virtue Of Being a Great Team Player

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We talk a lot about leadership but how can you be an outstanding teammate?

We don’t celebrate outstanding “teamship” enough. And just as leadership is contextual (qualities vary from team to team), so is teamship.

Here’s a process that may be helpful:

  1. Brainstorm qualities considered valuable on your team, along with behaviors demonstrating those qualities (e.g. caring, accountable, encouraging, supportive, attentive, etc.)
  2. Take five minutes before every team meeting to tell a story about a team member who demonstrated one of these qualities. Shine a light on success.
  3. When someone on the team demonstrates one of these attributes, let them know how much you appreciate them and why.

Acknowledging and appreciating people for their contributions is not a well-developed muscle in our society. It takes practice and vigilance to strengthen our capacity. But maybe teamship requires at least the same attention that we give to leadership.

Both are required to create a great team.

Trust may not be what you think it is.

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Like so many words, trust is both over-rated and misunderstood. I often hear, “I’m not going to engage here because there’s no trust,” or “We have to work on getting trust before we can achieve results.”

One thing I know about trust is that it is not a prerequisite. Trust, like confidence, isn’t something you need before you do something. Instead, do something right and trust will follow. If you want trust before you take a risk, there’s no risk. There’s no action. And there’ll be no trust.

Instead of waiting for, or worrying about, trust, get to work on a worthwhile project and trust will emerge from your actions. Be intentional about building cohesiveness through clear expectations, empathic communication and the safety to speak up, and trust will be your reward.

In short, the feeling of trusting someone is built on right actions. You don’t feel your way into right action. You act your way into right feelings.

And getting trust leads to more trust. Trust begets trust.