Reflections on Resolutions – Meeting The New Year With Authenticity

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On behalf of our team, we appreciate you being part of our Authentic Leadership community and look forward to continuing to support your commitment to live and lead the authentic way.

With a new year comes a renewed resolve to better ourselves. While this time of year presents an opportunity for self-reflection, a review of the past year, and considerations for the year ahead, we know that most New Year’s resolutions often peter out in the first month or even week. The busiest month for gyms is January.

Here’s three simple reminders for making your New Year’s resolutions meaningful and sustaining:

  1. Take an honest self-assessment. Take time to reflect on the past year and consider the year ahead. Truthfully ask if you want to make changes in your life. No one has to transform their lives just because our culture suggests you need to make resolutions. Maybe you have been through too many changes in 2023 and need some rest this coming year. Nothing wrong with that as a resolution. Listen to your authentic self, not your apathetic self that wants to hang on to the status quo or your conforming self that wants to follow the crowd.
  2. Create a compelling vision. Following through on an agreement to change something requires a persuasive reason to do so. My vision to build a global community of authentic leaders and difference makers requires that I sustain my mental and physical health. My vision inspires me to get up in the morning and exercise. This year I want to get back to playing the piano – a passion I have neglected the past few years. I’m not planning on being a concert pianist; I just enjoy it and it’s good for my brain to learn new pieces.
  3. Create a system of non-negotiable habits. Change occurs with consistent daily progress. It’s not the big wins that propel us forward. It’s the unwavering habits that you integrate into your life that builds integrity and self-respect and move you toward a new life. Integral to these new habits will require assistance from others. Rarely does lasting change happen alone, so find an accountability partner who will support you and hold your foot to the fire to follow through.

Lasting change is about direction, not velocity. Please reach out if we can support your journey in any way.
May you find you find meaning and prosperity in all your efforts.

Canadian leadership team from Doka

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Earlier this month, I had the extreme pleasure of spending some time with the Canadian leadership team from Doka, an amazing company with incredible leaders from around the world.

I had a wonderful experience for three inspiring days as they demonstrated passion, accountability, authenticity, and a high level of engagement.

Life will always include difficult people that pose challenges in our relationships.

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Life will always include difficult people that pose challenges in our relationships. The question is: how can we deal with our relationships the authentic way?

Join David as he shares his experience and perspective on dealing with difficult people in our lives – with courage, clarity, and compassion.

  • Discover how problems in relationships are designed, not to be solved, but to be instructive.
  • Learn practical ways to deal with the difficult people in your life in an authentic way.
  • Learn strategies to keep your mental health strong – the best way to respond to people in your life who irritate and frustrate you.

Sign up here for our complimentary webinar: https://lnkd.in/d37Prt4a

Authentic Leadership Academy

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The past month I had the privilege of leading two Authentic Leadership Academies: one in-person and one virtual. This work is deeply fulfilling and meaningful – an expression of my own personal reason for being. After an extremely rewarding in-person event, I wondered if it was possible to bring the same level of depth and connection into an online community. And the amazing group of committed difference-makers surprised me. We had an equally satisfying experience in our four days of the online event.

Both events left me inspired by the power of the human spirit. When a group of people come together committed to be real with each other, they let down their guard and discover their true essence and authentic leadership to create an authentic community. The venue or the medium makes little difference. True magic happens through a shared vision and commitment to be better leaders by being better human beings.

In this video, you will hear from our in-person attendees about their experience in the Academy.

If you would like to join us, both versions will be offered again in the Spring.

Dealing With Gossip – The Authentic Way

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We’ve all been there. Criticizing someone who isn’t in the room. Badmouthing a colleague. Condemning our boss.
It’s called gossiping and means we disrespect a person in their absence.

What I’ve learned about gossip:

  1. It’s a defense against having the courage to be direct. It’s easier to deal with our anger towards someone by talking poorly about them when they aren’t present.
  2. It’s addictive. You can get a high from self-righteousness, especially when you get someone to listen to you.
  3. It erodes trust. Suppose we criticize our supervisor in a way we wouldn’t dare if they were present. What happens if we have a falling out and you see me speaking with that same supervisor?
  4. It eats away at your integrity. Being one way with one person and another way with another exposes dishonesty and insecurity and leads to disrespect.

Authenticity, when it comes to gossip, requires three decisions:

a) Decide you will be loyal in people’s absence. It will earn you self-respect, respect of your comrades, and will foster trust. If you want to retain those who are present, be loyal to those who are absent.

b) Decide to be direct with the person you are frustrated with or let it go because it’s not the right thing at the moment to bring it up directly with them.

c) Decide that self-respect that comes from integrity is more worthwhile than the superficial approval from preying on another person’s weaknesses.

When a person starts gossiping to you:

i) Empathize with their feelings, but tell them you don’t participate in gossip.

ii) Bring all the parties together (if you have a role to do so) to deal with the issue directly.

iii) Talk about positive things about the person in their absence.

iv) Apologize when you forget all this and get sucked back into the comfort and ease of gossip rather than the courage of your convictions.

v) Remember that all these principles and practices apply to personal and family relationships as much as they apply to relationships in the workplace.

Is it ever okay to lie at work?

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What upsets me is not that you lied to me, but that I can no longer believe in you. – Friedrich Nietzsche

No. It is never okay to lie at work.

But you have to understand that, while telling the truth is vital to establishing trust, truth-telling has to be tempered with skill, tact, and good judgment. Truth without respect is not truth at all. It’s brutality. The kind of truth when your four-year old says you look fat in a bathing suit lacks maturity and sensitivity. You expect that from a four-year old, but not a forty-year old.

Sometimes we need to withhold information or temper the truth with discretion because we deem it best for the greater good or for the good of the person on the receiving end.

In “The Speed of Trust,” Stephen Covey tells a story about his father in a clothing store in Canada. As he was considering the cost of purchasing a fairly expensive coat, he mentioned that he would have to add to the duty tax that would be imposed when he returned to the U.S:

“Don’t worry about the duty,” the store manager said. “Just wear it! Then you won’t have to pay the tax.”

“But I have to declare the things I’ve bought and am bringing into the country,” my father explained.

“Don’t declare it; just wear it,” the manager said once again. “Don’t worry about the tax.”

My father was silent for a moment, and then said, “Look, frankly I’m not as worried about having to pay the tax as I am about that new salesperson you’re training. He’s learning from you. What is he going to think when you sign his commission? What kind of trust is he going to have in you in guiding his career?”

So… if you want to build trust, good will, and respect in the workplace, it’s never okay to lie.