Tag Archive for: growth

3 Habits you can start TODAY to make you a better leader

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  1. Stop working. I’m not saying be lazy, but reconsider what real work is. We typically think we aren’t working if we aren’t in front of our computer. Get up from your desk and visit or call a member of your team. Find out how they’re doing. Listen to their concerns and take the time to assess their level of passion, energy, and alignment to the work they’re doing.
  2. Clarify your why. Ask yourself why you get out of bed in the morning. Why do you come to work? Why did you take on the position of leadership? Why is what you do important to you? It doesn’t have to be a fancy mission statement. It just has to be clear enough to inspire you to show up with greater passion, energy, and focus.
  3. Start sharing your why. Let others know what your vision is and why what you do matters to you, the team, and the organization. Let people know how important they are to your vision and to the purpose of the organization. Renew your explicit commitment to support them with their dreams and their vision. Ensure that your aspirations and values are aligned.

Words people use to describe great leaders

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If you ask AI for a profile of a great leader, you’ll get something like, “great leaders are visionary, inspirational, empathetic, decisive, innovative, collaborative, charismatic, resilient, authentic, and strategic.” This may be a good list to aspire to, but it’s an impossible standard to uphold if you think you have to be there to be called a great leader.

While the best leaders (with or without a title) do exhibit many of these attributes, the two qualities that eclipse them all are self-awareness and self-assurance (my good friend, Jeremy Amyotte, wrote a great book on these topics). Some days you may not exhibit any of these qualities, or some are simply not in your wheelhouse of strength. Self-awareness and self-assurance mean that you are comfortable enough with yourself to be honest about the gaps in your leadership – whether on a particular day or in your leadership in general – and either find others to fill those gaps or at least not hurt people or your organization by your unacknowledged blind spots.

Self-awareness and self-assurance come from making time for self-exploration. We all have the capacity to be a leader in our own unique way. Thankfully there’s no profile of an ideal leader. What leaders must be willing to do, however, is devote themselves to increasing their self-awareness and self-assurance. People that are willing to look inside themselves, listen humbly to hard feedback, get ongoing support from trusted confidants, and be committed to continual growth, tend to be called great leaders.

When is help not helpful as a leader?

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We raised chickens on the farm growing up. It’s painful to watch a chick hatch when you’re a born caregiver like me. One day I “helped” a chick by breaking the egg for it. To my horror, it died.

On that fateful day I learned that sometimes help isn’t always helpful. Sometimes people need to go through the struggle to gain the strength to succeed. I see this when we do too much for kids. We call it snowplow parents when we prepare the road for the child rather than prepare the child for the road. Snowplow parenting and snowplow leadership can lead to entitlement, anxiety from a lack of confidence to deal with the reality of life, and burned out leaders.

Snowplow leadership is always fueled by caring, but expressed through overprotective.

What might you be doing as leaders to help your teams too much and thereby have them miss out on growth opportunities?

Are you re-inventing yourself when necessary?

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It’s natural to get comfortable in our life situation. But if we aren’t conscious and intentional, we can unknowingly become unsuitable to our existing environment. I’ve learned is that it’s good to periodically re-invent yourself in response to different life events. Regularly renewing yourself is a crucial component of personal growth and development. Otherwise, we can get trapped in cycles of complacency. What got you here won’t necessarily get you there.

I find this true in the speaking business. I give a presentation. The audience loves it. So I repeat it to the next audience. And they love it. Even though I customize the material, it’s easy to get into a rut giving essentially the same presentation over and over. Success can actually lead to failure.

It’s been the big changes in my life that have created the most meaningful opportunities to re-invent myself: the death of a close relative, the birth of a grandchild, kids leaving home; downsizing and moving to a new location. And now I am re-examining and rebranding our Authentic Leadership Academy with a team of colleagues.

How are you re-inventing yourself to respond to different life events?

Don’t Get Stuck In The Pursuit Of Perfection: The Power of Small, Continuous Improvement

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I’ve always had a hard time enjoying an activity because of my unrealistic expectations of perfection. Years ago I took piano lessons and I recall how much I practiced Für Elise focusing on perfection. I became hyper-aware of each barely noticeable flaw and when a finger slipped and shattered any illusion I had of perfection, I was devastated. Despite playing very well for several minutes all I could focus on were the mistakes.

Unable to appreciate my overall accomplishment or joy of making music I was ready to quit and didn’t play again until my next lesson.

After hearing my frustration, my wonderful piano teacher stopped my playing and gently said, “You’re never going to be a concert pianist, David. Why don’t you just enjoy playing?”

That was a life-changing moment. Instead of a perfectionist, I am learning to be content with making progress. I realize that perfectionism is only a coping mechanism to cover up inadequacy. It can paralyze us, holding us back for fear of falling short of impossibly high standards. At best it becomes a reason to quit, an excuse to save face. At worst, it creates a life of unending tension and stress.

Living authentically means a willingness to make mistakes and stumble, providing that we’re stumbling forward. Today I’m not so interested in what I can achieve as much as what I am becoming. I’ve not “arrived” because there is no finish line. When I remember this, life is more enjoyable.

How do you counter entitlement in your culture?

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When you see entitlement in the culture where you live or work, there are five steps to counter it:

  1. Model the way. Just as you won’t expel darkness with frustration, you won’t drive out entitlement with annoyance. Instead of complaining, be the light. You attract others by being attractive.
  2. Stick with the winners. Find the allies in your culture who live by the values you are committed to and work together to create the kind of environment you want to work and live in.
  3. Put your attention on personal responsibility. Whatever you focus on will grow. If you focus on being frustrated with entitlement, your frustrations will flourish. If you attend to the values you are committed to live, they will grow.
  4. Stay grateful. The attitude of gratitude is the antidote to entitlement. What you appreciate will appreciate.
  5. Be careful not to make things too easy for those under your care. Comfort breeds entitlement.

If you want to learn more about how giving too much and making it too easy for people breeds entitlement, check out my next webinar, February 23rd at 11 AM MT. https://lnkd.in/d37Prt4a