Tag Archive for: Articles by David Irvine

Culture and Kindness

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This week I presented to an amazing group of education and health care leaders – an organization called Ever Active Schools: professionals who are committed to building programs in our schools that will get – and keep – kids healthy. I always get inspired when I am with a group of passionate visionaries who are truly shaping the future. And what wonderful values: kids and health. As I spent the day with this group, one conversation stood out. I asked one of the old-timers in the room what he did. “I get asked to do workshops for schools on bullying,” he replied. “But I don’t do workshops on bullying. I do workshops on kindness. Instead of bullying, we need to focus on being considerate of each other. Kindness will then dissolve bullying.”

Now that’s wisdom. For the past few days I have been reflecting on the application of this simple truth. Not only could we use more kindness in all of our cultures, we could all benefit from concentrating on the positive, instead of attacking our problems by focusing on the negative. Where have you turned problem into a solution by focusing on the positive side? I’d love to hear.

The First Condition Of Employee Engagement: Engagement

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My teenage daughters have been, by far, my best teachers in understanding engagement. When I’ve been traveling for an extended time and disconnected from them, my tendency is to come home and see all the things they aren’t doing to help around the house. When I’m tired and detached from them I’ll notice how they haven’t been keeping their rooms clean enough, their chores haven’t been done adequately, and their responsibilities have been neglected. Then I’ll proceed to lecture them and willfully try to “engage” the “disengaged.” This type of approach, or management by pressure, is what Ken Blanchard used to call “seagull management,” which means you ignore people and then you fly around and crap on them. The obvious result of this line of attack is resistance, disengagement, and power struggles.

What my kids continue to teach me is that if you want engagement, you first of all have to be engaged. Paradoxically, commitment and accountability for results is correlated with the time you spend with your kids when you aren’t expecting anything, when you are just hanging around, listening and hearing their concerns and desires. Before you can engage people you have to be engaged with them. Connection – or reconnection if you have been detached – is a prerequisite to engagement. So often I see executives in their corporate offices sending out employee engagement surveys to people they don’t even know and then wondering why people say they are disengaged. Sole reliance on employee engagement surveys to assess whether your employees are engaged is an indication of disengagement!

Obuntubotho – The Essence of Being Human – And of Being A Great Leader

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When Bishop Desmond Tutu introduced Nelson Mandela at his inauguration as the new president of South Africa, he described him as being a man who had Obuntubotho. “Obuntubotho,” he said, “is the essence of being human. You know when it is there and when it is absent. It speaks about humanness, gentleness, putting yourself out on behalf of others, being vulnerable. It embraces compassion and toughness. It recognizes that my humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together.”

Obuntubotho is not only the essence of being human. It’s the essence of great leadership, because the essence of great leadership is being human.

Who do you know in your workplace or in your life who has this quality of Obuntubotho? When you stop and pay attention, you know when it’s there, and you know when it is absent. As a leader, how are you consciously developing this quality within yourself?

Remembrance Day, The Horrors of War, and Living Honorably: “Earn This.”

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My sister, Kate, lost her father (my mother’s first husband) in WWII, so Remembrance Day has always had significance to me. But with our Canadian Armed Forces in Afghanistan, Remembrance Day now has a different feel to it. It’s more real. It’s closer to home. I was moved this year by CBC’s stories of some of the Canadian families who have lost loved ones in the Afghanistan conflict.  I like to watch war movies this time of year, at least war movies with a message.

Saving Private Ryan is a classic. The opening scene of Steven Spielberg’s classic finds us in an American military Cemetery in present-day Normandy, France. An older Ryan, accompanied by his family, searches for one particular grave — Captain John Miller. When he finds it he’s overcome with emotion and his memory sweeps back in time to D-Day, the Sixth of June 1944.

A discovery is made in the condolence section of army headquarters. Three brothers of the Ryan family have been killed almost at the same time. A fourth brother, James Francis Ryan, is somewhere in Normandy with the 101st Airborne Division. The Chief of Staff of the Army, General George Marshall, orders him found and “get him the hell out of there.”

Captain Miller and a small patrol of his Rangers are ordered inland from the beach to find Ryan. At last, after taking much hardship through enemy lines, they find  Ryan. But in the village, where remnants of the 101st are defending the bridge, Ryan refuses to abandon his duty and his buddies. Reluctantly, Miller decides to stay and join in the defense. The prospects are bleak. Nevertheless, Miller organizes the men and plans the defense.

The Germans show up with two Tiger tanks, several armored vehicles and infantry. The fight for the town is vicious. The Americans fall, one by one. Miller won’t give in, even as the German tank approaches the bridge. But the tank is blown up at the last minute by a P-51 just as American reinforcements arrive. Miller, at the end, gives Ryan a life mission to take home with him: “Earn this.”

Ultimately, Spielberg’s message is not hard to get across: war is brutal. But this film is not simply about the horrors of war, it is a story of men and sacrifices. While all eight men lost their lives in the mission to find Private Ryan, we have all been given a similar life challenge. Think of the men and women who have lost their lives, their limbs, and their mental well-being for us. Are we earning the life we are living? Are we living honorably? Do we remain grateful?

Accountability Quotes To Inspire You

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“Accountability is the ability to be counted on.”

“Accountability is the keystone on the bridge of trust.”

“If you are trying to get someone to be more accountable, start by getting them more passionate. If you aren’t accountable, you haven’t found enough reasons to be accountable.”

“Vision and Passion precede accountability.”

“If people don’t own it, they won’t do it.”

“This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.” ~George Bernard Shaw, Irish playwright, philosopher, and co-founder of the London School of Economics

“It’s not greener on the other side of the fence. It’s greener where you water it. Now get busy and turn on the hose.”

“Where does change begin? It begins in this room. Why? Because this is the room you are in.” ~Peter Block

“How many of you have ever thought less of a person because they put up their hand and said, “I’m accountable for that?””

“If it is to be, let it begin with me.”

“There are two kinds of people in the world: those who make things happen and those who complain about what’s happening.”

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” ~Margaret Mead

Acknowledging Others

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I received an email this week from a friend who told me he had recently written letters to 10 people who had made a significant difference in his life. He felt this was a project that he wanted to do, and as I was on his list, he wrote and expressed appreciation for the difference I had made in his life. He wrote to some people who had died (his parents) and to two or three people from different phases of his life. He benefited greatly from doing this exercise as he reflected and gave thanks for the tremendous support and excellent role models in his life. He shared with me how doing this exercise became a great reminder of how blessed his life has been. It also helped him be humble. He would not have had the success and absolutely wonderful life he enjoys today without the help of all the good people he has known. He was also challenged to live his life so that he might be an example and a help to people.

It reminds of how Zig Ziglar has a “wall of influence” in his office, photos of 25 people who made a difference in his life.

How are you acknowledging others?