RISE ABOVE – Unleashing Potential Through the Power of Accountability

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From the ages of fourteen to eighteen I worked part-time alongside Bob Dye, a carpenter that my parents hired for renovation projects. I remember the care that Bob put into his work. He was a true craftsman. He left nothing to chance. He took pride in his work. He taught me how to hold a hammer and how to sink a nail. He taught me how to use a power saw safely and how to square a floor in a crooked house. He showed up every day on time with a smile on his face and a positive attitude. Whether he was framing or finishing, craftsmanship showed through in everything he did.

He was patient with me when I made mistakes. I think he liked working with me because I showed up on time and worked hard. In hindsight, I’m sure I slowed him down, but he never mentioned it. I remember cutting a dozen two-by-fours three inches too short. He smiled and responded, “I also had to learn the hard way that it’s always good to measure twice and cut once.” I imagine my dad talked with him about having him apprentice me, both in carpentry and in life. My attitude was certainly bigger than my skill level, and he respected me for that. He was shy and gentle and had a big heart and was always kind and generous to me. I looked forward to working alongside him on Saturdays, after school, holidays, and summers. Dad would work with us whenever he could. I’m grateful that I had older men in my life that loved me, took time for me, and were good role models.

My parents paid Bob by the project, and when the project was done, he would give them an invoice and say, “Take your time and inspect our work. If it meets your standards, pay me. If not, there’s no charge and we’ll re-do it.” Bob was serious, even though not getting paid would have put a severe financial hit on his family. He also had a respectful way of making me feel part of his team, that we had achieved this together, even though he did the real work and there was just the two of us.

That pay-me-when-you-know-it’s-done-right approach was not a show. It was a demonstration of integrity. It was an expression of his character. And not once, in all those years, did we have to re-do a job or not get paid. As it turned out, Bob inspired me with a blueprint for how to run my business for the past forty years.

It’s inspiring to be around an accountable person, a person that can be counted on, a person that takes pride in their work, who demonstrates care and civility, who shows up, is committed to creating value before they get paid, and who makes you a better person for being in their presence. I’ll always cherish Bob for being my mentor.

Accountability is not a hammer to punish people. Accountability was never meant to be used as a disciplinary measure. Even though we need to face the consequences of our choices, accountability is not an HR performance management process or appraisal program. Accountability – the ability to be counted on – is a philosophy of life that inspires and empowers us to rise above mediocrity, renews our workplaces, restores our mojo, and gives us our freedom.

From Struggle To Emergence: Adversity as a Call To Creation

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When I launched my speaking profession, I partnered exclusively with a speakers’ bureau. Speakers’ bureaus serve a great purpose as intermediaries between professional speakers and clients. They represented me, did all the negotiations, booking, marketing, and event coordination.

After three years of working with them, they went bankrupt. It was devastating. I was shocked, angry, and dismayed that a company I trusted could leave me with several thousands of dollars in unpaid invoices. There was security in that relationship. I could count on the work, clients were cared for, and the money was there, just like a “secure” corporate job.

Through the light of times perspective, I now see that the loss of the money and relationship turned out to be a good thing. Adversity can be something wanting to be born. Ending that relationship allowed me to take flight, spread my wings, and find my own way in the marketplace. I would not have found my voice and built my business to what it is today had I stayed in that comfortable, “secure” relationship.

Adversity truly is an opportunity to call forth our potential, summon our hidden strengths, and birth new possibilities – even if the labour of that birth can be painful and arduous.

Two Kinds of AI: Artificial Intelligence vs. Authentic Interaction

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When I asked AI the difference between artificial intelligence (AI) and authentic interaction (AI), here’s what I got: “artificial intelligence (AI) and authentic interaction (AI) represent fundamentally different approaches to human connection and problem-solving. While artificial intelligence relies on algorithms and data analysis to simulate human-like responses, authentic interaction involves genuine human engagement, emotional understanding, and nuanced communication.”

However, only a human being can experience the difference between the two – to fully know the difference.

Artificial Intelligence is a great tool but there are severe limitations when it comes to human contact and connection. We can get so lost in the world of artificial intelligence that we don’t even know we are lost. As I say to my university students, “AI will help you write a better paper, but AI won’t help you be a better counsellor. For that, the art of authentic interaction must be mastered.”

I would love to hear your thoughts on the difference between the two AIs – Artificial Intelligence and Authentic Interaction.

We all have bad days – even weeks. How do you know when it’s a you vs. them problem?

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It’s never a you vs. them problem. It’s always a you and them problem. In every relationship challenge there are always two sides. When facing a relationship problem, the accountability approach asks: “How am I contributing to the problem I am complaining about?” This question implies a commitment to look at your side of the issue.

While the other person is also contributing to the problem, all you can control is your side of the street. It’s not necessarily 50/50, but there is always something you can learn and do differently. This replaces blame with personal responsibility and understanding.

How do you know when it is time for a change in your life or career?

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Signs to watch for:

  1. Lack of motivation
  2. Feeling unfulfilled
  3. Lack of growth opportunities
  4. Feeling undervalued and unappreciated
  5. Stagnant skill set – your skills are underused
  6. Negative, toxic work environment
  7. Work-life imbalance
  8. A gut feeling that you’ve evolved into the wrong place

These are emotional signs that indicate a need for a change, but they don’t necessarily mean it’s time to exit a career, a job, or a relationship. They could very well be telling you that it’s time to wake up and change the way you’re thinking or acting.

A process for using these signs to guide your choices:

  1. Pay attention when these indicators surface.They are telling you it’s time to change.
  2. Carefully reflect on what changes these indicators are guiding you to.
  3. Talk it through with a trusted confidant, coach, or confidant.
  4. Ask what you need to learn and change. If you don’t learn what you are meant to learn, count on meeting the same problem in the next environment you find yourself in. Geographic cures tend not to produce long-term results.

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RECHARGING LEADERS: Redefining Empathy and Resilience in the Workplace

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In a recent coaching session, a leader, who is very caring and in touch with his people, told me of a recent exchange he had with one of his team members where he outlined his expectations for the role he was in. The expectations didn’t seem excessive to me, but the employee responded with a letter to HR that his manager was “creating an unsafe work environment and putting unnecessary stress” on him. He expressed that this was a trauma he was experiencing at work that necessitated a stress leave.

I know there are always two sides to a story. I also know that many conscious, caring leaders grapple with how to build “high performing” cultures while navigating between holding people accountable for performance and avoiding being overly harsh or creating unnecessary stress on those they lead and serve.

There has been an important shift in recent years that emphasizes employees as whole people rather than “units of productivity.” This shift necessitates an attention to empathy, acknowledging the internal states and personal challenges of those around us.

But has all this sensitivity to people helped us to be mentally stronger? Is it empowering us and making us more resilient than previous generations? As critical as empathy and caring are, has it all gone too far? Are leaders working too hard to keep employees inspired and motivated? I believe it’s worth some consideration. It’s time to recharge leaders by redefining empathy and resilience in the workplace.

Some perspectives for leaders to consider:

  1. Take care of yourself. This has nothing to do with self-centeredness. It has to do with ensuring that your leadership comes from overflow not from emptiness. You can’t give what you don’t have. To inspire others, you must be inspired. Many of us give more attention to recharging our phones than recharging ourselves. Yet it still holds true that we need to look after ourselves so we can be there for others. Take care of yourself – whatever that means to you.
  2. Redefine empathy. Empathy has emerged as a critical component of effective leadership, reshaping how organizations approach workplace dynamics and employee well-being. But empathy isn’t about coddling people, making it easy, rescuing people from their unhappiness, or lowering your standards and expectations. Empathy fatigue often comes from working harder than the person we have empathy for. In the recovery and addictions field this is called enabling. Empathy, instead, is about supporting people, feeling with them, helping them find and develop the resources they require to do their job, and then being in their corner through the tough challenges that come with that responsibility. If empathy isn’t empowering people, it’s not empathy.
  3. Hire strong people. Work is hard. That’s why we call it work. Don’t use psychological safety as a weapon to hobble your manager. Managers have an accountability to hold themselves and their team to high standards that will require strength. Nobody takes pride in doing things that are easy. Let people know what is expected of them before you hire them and when they come on board. And make sure they’re up to the challenge. Hire people who are strong givers and are willing to do their part to co-create an inspiring, caring culture that will produce the right results.
  4. Make results your highest priority. Organizations are not in the business of taking care of people. Organizations are in the business of getting results. Of course, you won’t get results – and certainly not long term – if you don’t take care of people. We also won’t get the needed results if we burn our leaders out. Making results matter isn’t just good for organizations. It’s good for the mental health of the people who work in those organizations. It’s good for us all to be contributing to the world by producing meaningful results. It’s good for human beings to set our “problems” aside, lean into the grind, and push through to the other side. Getting stronger is what builds resiliency, not getting let off the hook. Just be sure that the results you are working on together are both challenging and meaningful and remember the purpose of business: it’s a tool to create what matters in life.